\u00c4\u201asta e titlul unui text scris de colegul meu de banc\u0103 din liceu, \u00een ianuarie 1997. Pentru a-l gusta pe deplin, trebuie un pic de munc\u0103: aminte\u015fte-\u0163i atmosfera din liceu, cu cercurile \u015fi preg\u0103tirile de dup\u0103 ore, acreala unor profesoare ce nu p\u0103reau a suporta pe nimeni, catalogul de 0.75 metri p\u0103tra\u0163i tr\u00e2ntit pe catedr\u0103 la fiecare \u00eenceput de or\u0103, mobilierul vechi din PFL rupt la col\u0163uri, lambriurile inscrip\u0163ionate cu pixul, geamurile imense sparte \u00eentr-un col\u0163 … gata? la citit. Merit\u0103. Enjoy.<\/p>\n
\u00cent\u00e2lnire la v\u00e2rf<\/strong><\/p>\n Se a\u015faz\u0103 fericit\u0103 \u00een fa\u0163a oglinzii. E una dintre pu\u0163inele pl\u0103ceri pe care \u015fi le mai permite. Se machiaz\u0103 temeinic, \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 ia un aer de femeie fatal\u0103. \u00cembrac\u0103 apoi cel mai frumos deux-pieces<\/em> pe care-l are\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 pe care \u015fi l-a f\u0103cut acum trei ani cu multe sacrificii -a \u0163inut post mai bine de dou\u0103 luni. Se parfumeaz\u0103 cu ceva cam \u00eendoielnic, apoi \u00ee\u015fi compune o privire superioar\u0103. \u00ce\u015fi scoate, plin\u0103 de siguran\u0163\u0103, b\u0103rbia \u00een afar\u0103 \u015fi respir\u0103 sacadat ca o domni\u015foar\u0103 la prima \u00eent\u00e2lnire.<\/p>\n \u00cei place s\u0103 se cread\u0103 \u00eenc\u0103 foarte frumoas\u0103 \u015fi admirat\u0103. E unicul capriciu al unei vie\u0163i monotone, s\u0103race, m\u0103cinate de invidii \u015fi de dorin\u0163a de parvenire.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Mai arunc\u0103 o ultim\u0103 privire \u00een oglind\u0103 \u015fi dintr-o dat\u0103, ca din senin, \u00ee\u015fi aduce aminte cu nostalgie de timpurile c\u00e2nd to\u0163i b\u0103rba\u0163ii o priveau \u00eentr-un fel anume<\/em>. Pe atunci era \u015fi ea dorit\u0103, util\u0103. Dar acum, c\u00e2nd conforma\u0163ia i s-a mai\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 modificat<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 i-au r\u0103mas doar galanteriile platonice ale colegilor cu p\u0103rul alb sau chei\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n \u00ce\u015fi revine repede din g\u00e2ndurile melancolice, neadecvate evenimentului pentru care se preg\u0103te\u015fte. \u00cen fond, o dat\u0103 pe an are loc Cercul<\/em><\/strong>, la care urmeaz\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi \u00eent\u00e2lneasc\u0103 to\u0163i colegii de breasl\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 discute probleme foarte importante, care cer o rezolvare grabnic\u0103 pentru societate<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n \u00cen sala destinat\u0103 unor \u00eent\u00e2lniri at\u00e2t de prestigioase, o sal\u0103 \u00e2\u20ac\u201d din p\u0103cate \u00e2\u20ac\u201d nezugr\u0103vit\u0103 de mai bine de zece ani, dar av\u00e2nd pere\u0163ii acoperi\u0163i cu o mul\u0163ime de plan\u015fe \u015fi materiale explicative, demonstrative<\/em>, \u00eencep s\u0103 intre participan\u0163ii la Cerc<\/em><\/strong>. To\u0163i au un aer afectat, par foarte siguri pe ei. \u015ei totu\u015fi, din c\u00e2nd \u00een c\u00e2nd, atunci c\u00e2nd se cred neobserva\u0163i, \u00ee\u015fi arunc\u0103 unii altora priviri furi\u015fe, curioase, \u00eendelung cercet\u0103toare.<\/p>\n Aproape to\u0163i s-au \u00eembr\u0103cat ca \u015fi c\u00e2nd ar fi venit la oper\u0103. Unul singur, foarte t\u00e2n\u0103r \u00e2\u20ac\u201d probabil c\u0103 e la primul Cerc<\/em><\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u201d a venit \u00een blugi. \u015ei nici nu observ\u0103 privirile critice \u015fi dispre\u0163uitoare ale colegilor lui. St\u0103 cu o carte \u00een m\u00e2n\u0103, din care cite\u015fte pe ner\u0103suflate, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 se sinchiseasc\u0103 de lipsa lui de \u0163inut\u0103 de gal\u0103.<\/p>\n Atmosfera preliminar\u0103 deschiderii Cercului<\/em><\/strong> propriu-zis se vrea una de club. Pe masa din centru se afl\u0103 c\u00e2teva farfurioare cu fursecuri \u00e2\u20ac\u201d fiecare doamn\u0103 a adus de acas\u0103 c\u00e2te cinci-\u015fase, c\u00e2te a putut \u00e2\u20ac\u201d \u015fi c\u00e2teva sticle cu b\u0103uturi r\u0103coritoare extrem de colorate \u015fi extrem de ne\u00eendestul\u0103toare pentru at\u00e2ta asisten\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n Doamnele de mod\u0103 veche, cu educa\u0163ie solid\u0103, nu se dezmint \u015fi folosesc cu obstina\u0163ie doar jum\u0103tate din \u015fi-a\u015fa incomodul taburet din lemn. Domnii de mod\u0103 veche s-au grupat \u00eentr-un col\u0163 \u015fi discut\u0103 \u00eentre ei sobru, pompos, cu scopul de a demonstra c\u00e2t de corect vorbesc limba rom\u00e2n\u0103. Domnii mai tineri fumeaz\u0103 frivol. Bine c\u0103 sunt doar c\u00e2\u0163iva. Domnii foarte tineri \u00e2\u20ac\u201d cu excep\u0163ia celui \u00een blugi, care nu se sinchise\u015fte \u00e2\u20ac\u201d nu au venit. Pe ei nu-i intereseaz\u0103 s\u0103 fac\u0103 pu\u0163in\u0103 ordine, c\u0103 a\u015fa nu se mai poate<\/em>.<\/p>\n \u00cen aceast\u0103 interesant\u0103 adunare, Ea \u015fi-a g\u0103sit o companie foarte pl\u0103cut\u0103. Un domn distins<\/em>, nu prea \u00een v\u00e2rst\u0103, la vreo \u015faizeci \u015fi cinci de ani, pe nume Mur\u0103\u0163oiu, s-a a\u015fezat al\u0103turi. Este at\u00e2t de atent \u015fi darnic \u00een complimente!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Dac\u0103 n-ar avea deja un so\u0163 \u015fi doi copii acas\u0103, aproape c\u0103 ar fi gata s\u0103\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 At\u00e2t de galant \u015fi de \u00eenst\u0103rit e!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Dar asemenea lucru nu s-ar c\u0103dea la o femeie credincioas\u0103 ca Ea, un adev\u0103rat exemplu pentru societate\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n \u00cen sf\u00e2r\u015fit, Cercul <\/em><\/strong> este declarat oficial deschis \u015fi sesiunea de discursuri \u00eencepe.<\/p>\n Dintr-o pur\u0103 coinciden\u0163\u0103 calendaristic\u0103, ea \u00eei este dedicat\u0103 lui Eugen Ionescu. C\u00e2nd Primul Orator aminte\u015fte acest am\u0103nunt, toat\u0103 audien\u0163a izbucne\u015fte \u00eentr-un pios \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Dumnezeu s\u0103-l ierte!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d. Primul Orator continu\u0103 prin a anun\u0163a tema discursului s\u0103u: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Disciplina \u00een r\u00e2ndurile tineretului\u00e2\u20ac\u009d. To\u0163i cei de fa\u0163\u0103 consider\u0103 c\u0103 este o problem\u0103 european\u0103, luat\u0103 \u00een discu\u0163ie de tot mapamondul<\/em>. Mai pu\u0163in interesant\u0103 \u00eei pare tema t\u00e2n\u0103rului \u00een blugi, care nu se sinchise\u015fte \u015fi cite\u015fte \u00een continuu din cartea aia.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Dragi\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 stima\u0163i colegi, ne-am adunat ast\u0103zi \u00een jurul acestei\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 acestor mese, pentru a rezolva c\u00e2teva dintre problemele ce necesit\u0103 o grabnic\u0103 solu\u0163ionare \u015fi care, \u00een ciuda eforturilor noastre sus\u0163inute, r\u0103m\u00e2n mereu nerezolvate\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n \u00cen timp ce Primul Orator trage cu ochiul \u00een pupitru la urm\u0103toarea fraz\u0103, asisten\u0163a murmur\u0103 aprobator.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Costuma\u0163ie frivol\u0103, indecent\u0103, sexy, excitant\u0103 chiar! – continu\u0103 Oratorul.<\/p>\n Aici, domnul Gu\u015f\u0103 intervine \u00een deplin acord:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Chiar a\u015f vrea s\u0103 v\u0103 comunic\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Am v\u0103zut o t\u00e2n\u0103r\u0103 de cincisprezece ani \u00e2\u20ac\u201d un copil! \u00e2\u20ac\u201d care purta\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u00eemm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 lenjerie\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u00eemm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 un sutien negru\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u00eemm\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 sexy! Cum e posibil s\u0103 admitem una ca asta?!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Nevast\u0103-mea a \u00eenceput s\u0103 poarte a\u015fa ceva de-abia pe la \u015faizeci de ani\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u00eemmb\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u00eemmp\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n Amintirea acelei \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103ri l-a tulburat at\u00e2t de tare pe domnul Gu\u015f\u0103, \u00eenc\u00e2t \u00eencepe s\u0103 pl\u00e2ng\u0103 de\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 dezgust. Colegii sar s\u0103-l consoleze \u00e2\u20ac\u201d c\u0103ci el are o pozi\u0163ie \u00eenalt\u0103 \u00een aceast\u0103 breasl\u0103 \u00e2\u20ac\u201d \u015fi \u00eei promit c\u0103 vor avea grij\u0103 ca respectiva s\u0103 fie aspru pedepsit\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 nu mai poarte niciodat\u0103 un sutien negru, sexy\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 nici un fel de sutien.<\/p>\n Dup\u0103 aceast\u0103 scurt\u0103 \u00eentrerupere, Oratorul continu\u0103:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d B\u0103uturi nocive, excitante, cancerigene\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Coca-Cola!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 De neadmis! \u015ei c\u00e2nd le spui, \u00eei \u00eenve\u0163i de bine, r\u00e2d\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 r\u00e2d \u015fi nu se mai opresc\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Lips\u0103 de respect!<\/p>\n Murmurul aprobator al s\u0103lii cre\u015fte.<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Neseriozitate!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Vor pauz\u0103 de mas\u0103 \u015fi de b\u0103ut Coca-Cola!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Desigur, \u015fi noi m\u00e2nc\u0103m \u015fi bem. Dar noi bem numai Fanta! \u015ei numai \u00een timpul lucrului!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 \u015ei nici nu r\u00e2g\u00e2im ca ei!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Cineva strig\u0103 din sal\u0103:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Ne sfideaz\u0103!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Ne sfideaz\u0103!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n Domnul Mur\u0103\u0163oiu g\u0103se\u015fte c\u0103 momentul este prielnic s\u0103 se afirme \u015fi el, exprim\u00e2ndu-\u015fi dezaprobarea:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d \u015ei merg unii pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 al\u0163ii\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Fete \u015fi b\u0103ie\u0163i, vreau s\u0103 spun\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Ba, o dat\u0103\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 n-o s\u0103 v\u0103 vin\u0103 s\u0103 crede\u0163i\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 am v\u0103zut o pereche s\u0103rut\u00e2ndu-se\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 ling\u00e2ndu-se\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Ziceau c\u0103 se iubesc\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Groaznic!<\/p>\n Oratorul nu mai are nici o \u015fans\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi continue discursul preg\u0103tit. A\u015fa c\u0103 strig\u0103 din r\u0103sputeri:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d V\u0103 mul\u0163umesc pentru aten\u0163ie! \u015fi se a\u015faz\u0103 epuizat la locul lui.<\/p>\n O mul\u0163ime de domni \u015fi doamne povestesc \u00een cor tot felul de fapte oribile comise de tineret, se mir\u0103, se revolt\u0103, unii pl\u00e2ng\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 E un vacarm de nedescris\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Dup\u0103 ce to\u0163i \u015fi-au v\u0103rsat n\u0103duful \u015fi au obosit, \u00een sal\u0103 se las\u0103 o t\u0103cere penibil\u0103. Ea \u00ee\u015fi zice \u00een g\u00e2nd: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Acum e momentul!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d. \u00ce\u015fi aranjeaz\u0103 pu\u0163in \u0163inuta, coafura, \u00ee\u015fi umeze\u015fte buzele de pe care s-a cam dus rujul -c\u0103 e prost- se ridic\u0103 demn\u0103 \u015fi se adreseaz\u0103 adun\u0103rii:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Stima\u0163i colegi, vom lua m\u0103suri drastice. Vom planta gardieni la poart\u0103, la u\u015f\u0103, la fiecare col\u0163 de cl\u0103dire \u015fi de strad\u0103. \u015ei dac\u0103 se vor termina gardienii \u00e2\u20ac\u201d c\u0103 nu prea avem bani pentru salariile lor, \u015fi \u0103\u015ftia nu fac nimic pe gratis \u00e2\u20ac\u201d ne vom planta chiar pe noi! Trebuie s\u0103-i urm\u0103rim \u00een permanen\u0163\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103 le interzicem sutienele, Coca-Cola, apa, pauza de mas\u0103, dragostea!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Vom st\u00e2rpi frivolitatea!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 Mai ales la fete!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 B\u0103ie\u0163ii\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 b\u0103ie\u0163ii\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n \u00ce\u015fi mu\u015fc\u0103 involuntar buza de jos:<\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u201d Ei sunt b\u0103ie\u0163i!\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 V\u0103 promit c\u0103 vom lua aceste m\u0103suri! A\u015fa s\u0103 ne ajute Dumnezeu!<\/p>\n Ropote de aplauze izbucnesc \u00een jurul Ei. Ochii \u00eei str\u0103lucesc de m\u00e2ndrie. Iar efectul pe care l-a produs asupra domnului Mur\u0103\u0163oiu este foarte vizibil.<\/p>\n E noapte. Cercul <\/em><\/strong> a durat mai mult dec\u00e2t fusese planificat. Domnii \u015fi doamnele ies doi c\u00e2te doi din cl\u0103direa \u00eentunecat\u0103, ca dintr-un bar de noapte. Str\u0103zile sunt pustii. Nimeni nu-i poate vedea cum merg perechi-perechi. Numai domnul cel foarte t\u00e2n\u0103r \u00een blugi, care nu se sinchise\u015fte, s-a a\u015fezat sub un st\u00e2lp de iluminat \u00e2\u20ac\u201d singur \u00e2\u20ac\u201d \u015fi cite\u015fte.<\/p>\n Ea se \u00eendreapt\u0103 c\u0103tre cas\u0103 \u00eenso\u0163it\u0103 galant de domnul Mur\u0103\u0163oiu, care nu mai contene\u015fte cu avansurile. Ce p\u0103cat c\u0103 totul dureaz\u0103 at\u00e2t de pu\u0163in, numai p\u00e2n\u0103 ajunge la domiciliul conjugal, la so\u0163ul Ei, care nu mai este de mult romantic.<\/p>\n Originalul se g\u0103se\u015fte aici<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"